Aye Fuck

Aye. What else do I need to say. Aye as in fuck. Aye as in I.

I'll start with I Aye.

I haven't had a cigarette in 47 hours. I know, I know. I'm the shit. Or at least a piece of it. On occasion, I feel like a piece floating in a big ass bowl that wants nothing more than another crappy tasting, overpriced, tar tipped smoke. Other times, I can't stand to look at someone - anyone- while they're smoking.

I gave them up because I wanted it, it was time and they began tasting like shit months ago. No, it wasn't medical (or anything close); I just decided I was done, and like that, I am. I don't consider myself a quitter, but a non-smoker; reason being, because I no longer want or crave them in my life, and just the thought of lighting up makes me want to gag. (no, not preggers).

Simply... done.

And with that done is another I must mention. The Aye Fuck.

Not a pleasant - or literal - aye fuck.

Rescue Me. For fuck's sake, what a goddam train wreck this past season was. But the finale -
I'd like to know who actually wrote that shit so I could seriously consider putting a hit out for the numb shit. The slapstick humor for the show has always been low-brow and hilarious (that had to be Leary), but whoever came up with the series finale should swim with sharks.

What a disappointed, from the previews (lying ass bastards, I hate when they fuck with you, showing you shit that's really a dream sequence used as a tease - I'm a writer, fuckers, and that's the worse tease on the block. cheap whoring, for damn sure), but then to do what they did with my favorite character, no tears, no real sorrow beyond a couple looks, and then right back to the cheap jokes.

Get the fuck out. Bullshit. As much bullshit as pushing out a baby in two minutes time (no one bothers to call an ambulance, after all, it's so realistic!), fight over baby names after a miraculously short (not to mention insanely cliche) birth, and then go right back to discussing pizza toppings as if nothing at all transpired. Janet never gave birth in her bed, sans real medical attention (god help her if she lost too much blood!) or Tommy yet again falling and hitting his head pretty good (real comical...for spongebob).

THEN...THEN... the creme de la creme -

after numerous seasons of fighting, separating, near divorcing and fucking everyone else in new york, playing swap the brothers in bed, threatening untold times that if tommy didn't quit his dangerous work she'd take his kids and flee far away, Janet, lo and behold, tells a dickless and presumably balless Tommy that if he didn't go back to being a fireman, she'd kill him for being under foot.

That right there, gave me a massive migraine and almost caused me to break my own tv.

For years they fought about him giving that part of his life up, and he does. She says, nah, go back, and he meekly says, "OK."

GTF out yet again. Sorry, folks, I'd have killed that bitch right there and then. Talk about contemporary men being little more than eunichs.

Proof and point. Women treat men like shit, because they know, deep down, if the men love them, they'll take it. They'll take anything thrown at them, and this past season proves it. I don't know any real men than would willingly allow themselves to be treated so poorly by their wives or kids; but, they're real men, that act like men, think like men, and command like them.

Women, deep down, like that. Fuck no, we don't tell anyone. That's a secret. But if we're with a man -a real goddam man - then WE'RE the ones that turn to putty, fetching slippers and playing maid service. Take charge men (not cavemen) are sexy. Women that have husbands that behave like lapdogs are not -I repeat- are not respected.

Aye swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help me God.